I knew I had acclimated to life in the country but I don’t think I realized quite by how much.
I used to live near Boston, variously in inner surrounding suburbs and for a while on the outskirts but within the city limits of Lowell, for about 20 years. I would go into the city or work or entertainment often enough that I was no stranger to the sights and sounds and hustle and density of city life.
Even on my regular trips into the (small) cities and towns surrounding the tiny homestead, it was nothing like the experience of a major city like Boston. I didn’t think I would forget.
And I didn’t forget, but whoa, Johnny, neither did I remember.
Driving through Harvard Square and Somerville was remarkable. I saw far more individual humans in one scene than I would ordinarily see in *a month* back home, *including* my trips into town for supplies. It was a stark difference. So, too, the pace. So, too, the sheer variety of humanity. It’s quite homogeneous back home. I don’t mind that, nor do I mind the diversity, it’s just that the contrast was so very, very sharp.
I didn’t find the experience overwhelming, per se, but it was definitely more input than that to which I have become accustomed. Easily 10x the traffic density, or more. 100x the people density, or more. Structures, vehicles, likewise.
But aside from simply being different, it also no longer felt like I was visiting home. I mean, I certainly recognized the roads and buildings and culture but it was no longer familiar as my own. Where I live now, clothing is simple and functional. Vehicles, too. There is far more dirt everywhere, including the people and vehicles. And that is simply because all of life is dirtier there, from farming, to wood heat, to dirt roads without sidewalks, and such. People aren’t so much lost in their handhelds or headphones. They’ll look at you and say “hi” or wave – even to strangers – as they pass.
Right this moment, I am sitting in a cafe in Waltham as I wait for a store to open with which I have some business before I return home. There are 20 different WiFi stations in range. At my house, there is precisely one – mine.
It’s been amusing to see “likes” accumulate on one of my dating apps. It says I’m here, which is true, but it also says where my home city is (not my actual village, way too small to be an option, but at least the nearest city people may have heard of) as does the body of my profile mention that same city. It is a city name that is claimed by municipalities in a few states, but none of them within 250 miles and only one would come to mind to people around here. I would be legitimately astounded if so many women in metro Boston had to open their radius to 300 miles to find someone to consider dating! I suppose a small handful of folk might consider a long distance relationship, but I’m guessing most if not all simply assumed that anyone who showed up in their feed was a local resident. . . And clearly they didn’t really read my profile, which clearly indicates my region of residence. Kind of a bummer, really… some nice prospects are showing up in my inbox but then they don’t follow through with a message. Maybe they are reading the profile after I “like” them back. It seems to me that the read should happen first, no? Ah, well. I don’t think I’m missing out on anyone who is legitimately interested, but the false starts are disappointing… and their number only serves to remind me how shallow the pool is back home. So it goes. The benefit of being far from everything is also the burden of being far from everything: one is far from everything. And everyone.
Even so, I am keen to return to my quiet home and my dirt road and the frogs and salamanders and ravens and flickers and people who wave as they drive by in dirty pickup trucks and UTVs. If it turns out some city woman wants to visit the country from time to time and enjoy keeping company with me, she’s welcome to introduce herself and I’ll happily drive into town to meet at a cafe to get acquainted. And if nothing else, I’ll be right near the hardware store so I can pick up supplies before heading back home after.